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Beware! There's A Swindler About!

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Beware! There's A Swindler About!
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Fair Novigradians! Let it be known far and wide that Klaus Fetterling is a liar, a fraud and a swindler. The "miraculous hair-growing forumula" he sells is nothing more than well water from the Bits dyed with a modicum of lilac extract. The only effect imbibing this concoction is likely to bring about is a debilitating case of diarrhea which will keep you running to the outhouse day and night – a fact which I had the dubious pleasure of learning through first-hand experience. Therefore, if this shameless cheat should pay a visit to your domicile, buy nothing and instead tell him to go suck down his own remedy.
—– Volker Ollinger